Feel The Fear.

Feel The Fear.


Well here we are, I’m gonna tell you guys I’m scared shitless for trying to achieve a dream I’ve had since I was 6. No one ever talks about it,

Let me tell you why, now most people don’t say they are scared shitless, but I’m in this weird place where I’m excited as hell to be doing things that I’ve dreamt of and doing things that I love but I’m also so scared. Being scared in a place like this consists of being fearful to let people down and not be as great as I want to and hope to be. I don’t want to let people down, like my parents and everyone that I’m working with. I also don’t want to let people down that look up to me and people that I inspire. Most importantly I don’t want to let myself down.. and I think that’s one of the biggest things. Having the courage within yourself to achieve your dreams and goals and enough fire under your ass to never give up and never stop, no matter what gets in your way.

We are all scared to some extent at this point in our lives, I mean at any point in your life, with whatever you’re doing, It’s okay to be fearful, just don’t let it get in the way of doing everything you can to achieve your goals. It’s almost like you get this fluttery feeling in your chest like when your excited but also nervous. It’s been feeling like that to me and at times it’s SO annoying. Over the past couple months I’ve definitely become more of a homebody trying to stay focused and not let myself get distracted by all other things in life, because it can be draining to always be ON. By that I mean you can’t always be 100% for everything. You may want to be but you’ll just end up draining yourself and that version of you isn’t one you want to end up like 24/7. I just recently listened to a podcast by Katy Bellotte and she was taking about how this generation is the “Burnout” generation. Which is so true and you guys should all listen to it. She’s basically saying how we are the generation that doesn’t stop and we literally keep going and going and going till we either exhaust ourselves, burnout or get in bad mental states because of how much we are doing and committing ourselves to get done… to make something of ourselves. We have become the generation that doesn’t sleep and thinks “It’s Cool” which let me tell you is draining in itself. Don’t get me wrong I am all for work your ass off and do everything you can to achieve your goals and dreams, but don’t forget to take care of yourself along the way. The repercussions for not taking care of yourself are far worse than making the time to do it.


” This letter is to you.

The you that’s had a rough week. The you that seems to be under constant storm clouds. The you that feels invisible. The you that doesn’t know how much longer you can hold on. The you that has lost faith. The you that always blames yourself for everything that goes wrong. To You.

You are incredible. You make this world al title bit more wonderful. You have so much potential and so many things left to do.. You have time. Better things are coming your way, so please hang in there. You can do it. ”





An Evening With Clark Beckham

DRESS: Free People SHOES: Vince Camuto 
Alright it’s about time I write this post. 
On October 22nd Clark Beckham from American Idol Season 14 came all the way from Nashville to my lil’ ole small town in Washington to perform for a fundraiser for my work. 
This weekend was absolutely amazing, and for planning my first event with the help of my amazing Family it could not have gone better. Now let me tell you a little bit about what it was for. 
At MAC Cosmetics they have a line of lipsticks called Viva Glam and every year they have a new spokesperson for the lipstick… i.e Miley Cyrus, Ariana Grande, Rihanna, Elton John. 100% of the selling price of each lipstick or gloss purchased goes to a man, woman or child living with or affected by AIDS/HIV. That $17 does so much for someone. This is something that is not talked about enough and is still stigmatized. There are 36 million people in the US alone living with this. In my county alone there is only ONE facility that can treat people with this disease. How terrible is that. Not to mention you have to have enough money to be able to get treated, which is SO crazy expensive that people living with this can’t afford to get treated properly. 
The MAC AIDS Fund has raised over $500 million just by selling Viva Glam. This money goes back out to someone living with it, it doesn’t go to research, it helps someone every single day. 
NOW it is our turn to raise money. I, being the Viva Glam Ambassador came up with the idea on a whim for this concert, Didn’t think it could possible happen, I was joking at the time. I met Clark last year at the American Idol Tour and then got in contact with him and everything kind of fell into place after that and after a lot of hard work and planning. 
I knew Clark would be the perfect person for this event because his personality and heart just consume the room. He is the most inspirational soulful person I have ever met. His musical talent and songwriting just wows and amazes me every time. I can’t say I’ve been in a room filled with so much love and joy that there was that night. He even inspired me to pick up my guitar after YEARS of not playing and I’ve never been more inspired to keep doing what I love. PLEASE look up his music on Youtube and iTunes you will be blown away. 
I definitely can’t wait to do this again because it was so eye opening and I’ve learned so much putting this event together that I just want to do it all over again. 
Everything that we raised in ticket sales will be DONATED AND MATCHED BY MAC COSMETICS. For a small town and little time to sell tickets we raised $1800.
All I can say is Thank you. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.